Yes I Am A Princess

At LAX the other day (well, actually, next to LAX, in El Segundo, up on a hill) I was watching planes take off, when a man came up to the fence near me holding his young daughter, who was maybe three or four years old. He began calling out aircraft types along with airlines to her. "Hey look, over there, Southwest taking off! Do you know what that is? 737. Yeah! And look over there, Northwest. That's a 757!" That sort of thing. It made me wonder if I would ever feel the desire to indoctrinate my as-yet-theoretical children to the ways of planespotting. Would it make them grow up into budding young planespotters or is it just a freak genetic occurence where, in the womb at some point, some bit of code gets switched on and you're destined to be into planes later on?

At around the same time, down at the bottom of the hill, by the perimeter fence, I saw a "K-9 Police" car roll up. The cop got out looking official and somber, and then opened the back seat. Out of the car came a German Shepherd, bounding around excitedly on the grass. It was shocking only in that I have a notion about police dogs as being generally very serious. About as serious as their police-man counterpart, if not more, really. And yet here was this dog momentarily becoming a total dog and jumping around on a little patch of grass and peeing on trees and stuff.

The two incidents are unrelated and yet something about the fact that we were all next the airport while these great big machines thundered around in all directions kind of tied us all together.

Meanwhile, does anyone out there want to know which of the States I've been to? It would be pretty boring if I listed them, right? So, how about a graphical representation, brought to you by world66.com:





You can also do countries in a similar fashion. I should mention that I discovered that tool on a blog about travel which sometimes has some interesting stuff on it.

Speaking of travel, I'm going to Venezuela in May, and while researching Angel Falls, the famously enormous waterfall located in the jungles of that country, I came across the fact that people actually base jump off of it. Which is a thought I find totally terrifying yet fascinating. At this website you can watch a video of a guy doing the jump. It's pretty incredible. Anyway, some day I think I might want to do that.

Let's hear it for ba.com, the website of British Airways, for holding what I think must be a world record for number of choices for honorifics/titles to go before your name when making a reservation. I just came across this the other day in my part-time work as a frequent flyer consultant/adviser. They must have fifty choices for what goes before your name. Are you a Baron and want that to be reflected on your boarding pass? You'll have no problem at ba.com. Are you a Jonkheer, a Khun Ying, a Rear Admiral, a Sig Na, a Wg Cdr (what is that, wing commander or something?), or do you like to be addressed as "The Very Reverend"? You are in luck. Are you a Princess? Not a problem. It makes me want to book on ba.com just so I can have a boarding pass that reads 'Rear Admiral Gabriel Leigh.' But would it all fit on there? Perhaps the shorter 'Princess' would be more likely to show up in its entirety. Could they deny me boarding for saying I was a Princess? "I say sir, you are clearly not a Princess." To which I would have to respond, "How dare you!"

Want something to amuse yourself for two hours? Ever wonder about those Nigerian scam emails and who's actually writing them? Ebola Monkey Man is for you then, my good Jonkheer.

A Good Day at the DMV

I managed to go into the DMV today and get ahold of a California Driver License, all in about half an hour. Not only that, but every single staff member I came into contact with (a total of five) was pleasant and friendly. Am I in some sort of alternate dimension? The procurement of a CA Driver License is notable, however, because the written test they make you take is actually not completely easy. You have to get 30/36 correct to pass, and some of the questions are obscure and oddly worded. For example, do you know what specific kind of vehicle is the only one required to come to a complete stop before a rail crossing? The answer is: a truck carrying Haz-mats. Somewhat obvious, you might say, especially since it's multiple choice, but you know, that's easily the sort of question that could be a trick, and I would probably never in my life have been aware of that traffic rule had I not seen it on the test. Anyway, it was a tense ten minutes, but I ended up only missing two. Further proof that I'm the best driver in California. Naturally.

Another interesting item from the DMV (a nasty, horrible building over on Colorado Ave.) was a sign posted on the computer monitor at the photograph station. It said, "Please do not turn monitor, it may result in electrical failure." And I couldn't help but wonder on what kind of scale this electrical failure would occur. It made me want to turn the monitor, in fact, but I decided against it after the photo woman got upset at the way I put my thumb on the thumb-print machine. After that I really didn't want to upset her further by causing electrical failure.

I've been tipped off about this band called Los Amigos Invisibles, who are Venezuelan and reportedly quite good. However, I'm taking a big leap here in linking to them, because I haven't actually heard them yet. But they're playing at Coachella this year, and I'm very much hoping to make it there and check them out.

I'm not normally a fan of celebrity gossip-type items. They tend to make me feel kind of ill in fact, as much as I might regard them with a certain degree of fascination initially. However, this particular website, gofugyourself.com, had me thoroughly entertained for a good half-hour last night. Something about the writing, and the way the writer addresses the celebrity directly, I guess. Hilarious....

Etihad Airways. It's branded "the national airline of the United Arab Emirates" but has mostly been overshadowed by the Dubai-based Emirates Airlines (Etihad flies out of Abu Dhabi.) Emirates has a lot of hype around it because it ordered about seven thousand planes within the past year and has created a mega-hub in Dubai which is ever-expanding, and they have seemingly endless cash to throw around to fund this continuous meteoric rise. Which is especially impressive considering, as far as I'm aware, that the city of Dubai didn't even exist forty years ago. But anyway, back to Etihad--they just took delivery of a new 777-300ER, and I've seen some photos of the seating in that plane, and I must say they look like they're onto something. The business class seats look especially great. While those aisle seats might be a little too exposed to the aisle, the window seats look perfect--nicely tucked away, with a lot of privacy, and, very importantly, a clear channel through which to access the aisle. I hereby declare this the way forward in airline seating. Now to actually try the seats out (may have to wait a while on that one.) And if you're looking for more cabin pictures, take a look at the economy class seats. 10.4-inch screens!

Still haven't had enough airplanes? Why not take a look at the tail of a Frontier Airlines aircraft. They put cute wild animals on their tails. Doesn't it just make you want to route via Denver on your next transcon?

In closing, I have to confess that I went to see "The Pink Panther" and found it hilarious. I was laughing pretty much the entire time in fact. I must have been in just the right mood for it or something, but watching Steve Martin talk in that strange and garbled French accent for two hours was great. It was also funny to see how Kevin Kline didn't even make an effort at the accent. Half the time he sounded British. I like that approach. It was very funny. But the worst part of it all is that at home later that night, I actually went onto the iTunes music store and purchased that Beyonce song, "Check On It" or whatever it's called. Sure, it was at the urging of my roommate and her son who wanted to hear it, but I also had some inexplicable desire for the song. How's that for cross-marketing in action? The pop star acts in a movie, people come to see the movie, then buy the pop star's song later on. As I clicked "buy song" I could just picture Steve Martin and Beyonce Knowles exchanging at that moment a brief high-five over glasses of champagne.

Most Links Point to Somewhere

I'm beginning to think principally in terms of links, both in the online-world, and in an obscure way, outside of it. Links make everything happen--they keep things moving from page to page, and if I get in a certain mood and start clicking a whole lot, I'll very likely end up in some strange corner of the web that I never would have expected to. Not that I'm such a big "surfer." In fact, if anything, I'd rather be spending less time online looking at random web pages. But it's fun to see what you might find. Much in the way that in previous eras one might have gone on an exploratory stroll through the woods. Yes, you've heard right, nowadays we have no need of such inconvenient and tiring activities! I can sit in a chair and move about the world! It's incredible that the world even functioned before there were links....billions of links, each one leading to another thing, likely also filled with links....just think about it.

Above random links are from marriedtothesea.com and toothpastefordinner.com, two highly addictive websites.

So, as random and disparate links continue to pervade this blog, one might ask: do you actually have any focus in your blog? Why can't you have a blog just about ice cream flavors or button collections, so that it can become an internet cult-hit, and then you could put Google Adwords on it and start raking in the cash? And one would be making a fine point. But maybe my blog can become a cult-hit through having no actual subject, with sharp wit and the promise of cultural enrichment in its place. Spread the word, readers! I want this blog to be read by people in Mauritius! I'll stop short of hoping for it to reach the Maldives. For now, that is.

The double-decker A380 super-jumbo aircraft from Airbus is due to operate its first commercial flight at the end of this year, although many presume it'll end up being more like early 2007 when it actually does make it out. It's a pretty impressive project- they had to invest billions into it and design it all from scratch, and then, while it was still nothing more than a model on a computer, sell it to airlines with definitive delivery dates. Now those delivery dates have slipped and those engineers must be holding their collective breath hoping that they don't slip further. For those of you that don't know, aircraft manufacturers have to test the wings on an aircraft by bending them upwards with a big machine until they snap. Quite incredibly, they're able to, in theory, predict exactly at what amount of force the wing will actually cease to remain in one piece. The wing is supposed to stay together up to 150% of the anticipated highest load it would ever encounter while in flight. Recently, during this test, the A380's wing snapped at 146%. This is not a good thing. Details are sketchy at this point about what it might mean. It could be that this wing was faulty and a subsequent test will prove that all is well with the design or it could be that they have to actually make modifications to the wing. While we all wait to see the outcome of this drama, here's a pretty cool video showing the A380 being put together.

And if that doesn't kill enough time for you, go to the LAPD's crime map where you can see what kind of crimes have been committed where over a given period of time in my city. For some high crime incidences, check out the downtown area. Fun!

Want to stay up to date on building projects in Bangkok? Did you know that there's a forum for that?

And last but not least, Indian Airlines has a new color scheme. Pretty!

This morning it was grey and drizzly here, and really rather cold. But the clouds here make up for that kind of weather generally, taking on some pretty impressive blue-grey and silver tones, the likes of which I haven't seen in many places. So you see, California isn't all about sun and fun after all. Well, maybe the fun part is true.

How to Become a Rally Racer

I have this desire to get one of these and start doing some rally racing. I also have a desire to learn how to customize these cars myself, not to mention learn how to rally race. Because rally racing without knowing how, it occurs to me, might be a bad idea. Only problem is, I don’t really fit the type that tinkers with cars and races them, I think. Having looked at a few forums online for that sort of thing, I’m kind of amazed at the aggression these guys throw around, not to mention the total lack of attention to spelling. One guy will say something like, “hey, I think the WRX is prety cool becuz it has AWD and for that reason its better then the RX-8….” and invariably there’ll be a response within a few minutes by a guy saying “fuck you man, you fuking idiot. You know nothing you fucking gay.” And I can’t help but wonder exactly how that kind of reaction is warranted. Does give me a certain amount of trepidation at the thought of joining that world. I just want the cool machines and fast driving, without the anger, you know? I can tell you, people are a lot more passive on airline forums.

Have you ever heard of a Wholphin? That's the product of a whale and a dolphin mating. And supposedly it really happens. And the resulting creature does not look like this. But the reason I bring it up, and the reason I found out about the phenomenon, is that there's a new "DVD Magazine" that's being put out which seems very worthwhile, and it goes by that name. That's accessible at wholphindvd.com. Looks like they take a bunch of good films, mostly short ones, that haven't been seen, and include them on a DVD, and if you subscribe you get one quarterly. I think it's a great idea.

And just in case you were getting bored, take a look at this bit of information I just read, posted by millionmiler on flyertalk: "It's estimated that the average human eats 1/2 a kilogram (or one pound) of insects each year unintentionally. The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) allows by law for a certain amount of insects in food. According to the FDA Web site, every 100 grams of chocolate can have as much as 60 insect pieces in it, and a typical jar of peanut butter is allowed to have over 100 insect fragments."

Flyertalk is not usually reliable for information about insects, but there you have it anyway.

I'm back in Los Angeles, having arrived in heavily overcast, rainy weather. That's the first time I've arrived here by plane in anything other than heat, sun, and haze. A nice change, actually. Now it's back to being sunny, and I've mostly been walking around in a mild daze, the kind that tends to overcome me for a while whenever I do these large geographical shifts. And I seem to have a particular difficult time reconnecting to reality over on the west coast. I'm pretty sure it worked out alright last time though, after a few days, so I'm holding out hope.

Latest news: my A3 now has license plates. 5SRK968. Not a bad number, really.

Whilst I've Been On This Isle

"Britain, Britain, Britain....have you ever wondered about the people of Britain? Nor have I...."

So goes a very worthwhile television program. British, naturally. "Little Britain" is the name. Currently available on DVD in the US. Quite funny.

My blogging has stalled whilst I've been on this isle, I know, and I do apologize. I've been working, a lot, which is more than I can usually say for myself. We've gotten a lot done over here. I'm headed back to CA on Monday.

This trip I've seen more snow than I've seen in Britain during all my previous trips combined. Very strange. And sometimes it's been more like hail. One day the hail was quite large. The dog named Simba came in covered in white pellets. Looked like he'd been attacked by a gardener, or maybe a homeopathic doctor.

Freezing cold, blustery winds, sheep on green, muddy cliffs overlooking the Sea, chavs on the high street--basically your average West Country experience. The cliffs are especially pleasant in the winter. Something about the cold combined with the view of the rolling hills and the arc of the coastline, I suppose.

Meant to post this earlier, but you all should check out Eleni Mandell and her most excellent music. Went to see her play at Tangier just before leaving and she was great.

Big ups.